you have escaped me
into the ether of a year and a half
of other loves (for me)
and love (for you)
so much time, so much everything
and still i have poems for you

soon you will leave your
princedom by the sea and
so many memories, and what
will become of my memories without
you there?
they've no anchor, no reality,
they will float past falafel stands
and used bookstores and courtyards where
those for whom you were a precursor
will gather to discuss linguistics
and they will find no home

we will keep the pennsylvania turnpike
rainy radiohead night
my roots are there and up the road are yours
though i have lost bethlehem
joy of ice cream, of calling for dixie on a summer morning,
of damp concert gropings, embarrassment over indian food

and it is not to you what it is to me
most times it is not to me what it is to me now
at 2:00 am, alone, happy,
and still remembering what i lost that october afternoon,
putting you on a plane back to your own life

do i love you? do i commit that pointless treason?
i do not
but i remember loving you, burning for you, and
that is why these memories are unsettled tonight
fragile eggshell memories of the love of my life
who is no longer that